Reflections on Easter

At the conclusion of a powerful talk on Jesus Christ by President Thomas S. Monson, I felt moved by what only seems as the Spirit of Easter. I love the words, I love the message, and I love the songs of Easter--especially Easter hymns sung by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.  It caused me to think back on other Easter holidays.

In childhood, Easter was always a day to look forward too.  My childhood pictures are sprinkled with me in my new Easter dress, hand in hand with my cousin as we totted around gathering Easter eggs.  No doubt we wondered what on earth had gotten into our parents, but loved the strange new game of picking up brightly colored eggs in the yard!

My first memory of Easter was at my Nona's house in San Antonio--I must have been 4 or 5.  I remember so well how huge the basket of candy seemed, and specifically that I received a new toy that became a favorite in years to come--a My Little Pony Seahorse.  Easter became a magical morning that kept me going until Christmas :)

As time passed, I'm sure I became more aware of the eternal significance of Easter--of the Atonement that was celebrated.  I believe it took some time though, as I remember being a teenager, enquiring of my bishop what exactly the "Atonement" was.   The piece began to fall into place as I continued to study in the Church's early morning seminary program. The Atonement was a beautiful concept that Christ died for my sins, and rose from the dead.

It wasn't until the ages of 19-21 that I truly began to understand the Atonement as a powerful eternal force that affected me personally.  Experiences seemed to rush in all at once, within a 6 month period, that seared the meaning of the Atonement into my soul.

At age 19, I took a semester off of "normal" school to "study abroad"  at BYU's Nauvoo Joseph Smith Academy.  I became fully immersed in the history of the church, the faith of the pioneers, and reading the teachings of Joseph Smith.  My heart was touched, and the sins of my past began to way heavy on my conscious and my soul.  I remember reaching a point where I felt I could not breathe any longer in such a Spirit-infused place with such dirt on my hands. So, as my roommate slept one night, I quietly slipped out of bed, knelt on my knees, and humbly began to pray, pleading with the Lord for forgiveness of all I felt ashamed of. I told him of the Spirit I felt at the place I was in, and asked to be a part of it some how.  

I will never forget the feeling the enveloped me. It was a stern rebuke from my Father--one I expected and knew I greatly deserved.  However, what I did NOT expect was the complete outpouring of love that I felt accompanying that rebuke. It was a quiet scolding, and I felt as if someone who loved me dearly was holding me, and quietly saying "My daughter, never do that again, thank you for coming back. I love you. Let's move forward."  I was so shocked by the quick forgiveness and outpouring of love that I felt, that I knelt there weeping tears of gratitude of awe.  This was my first real experience with the Atonement that changed me.

A few days later, the disastrous events of 9-11 happened. I remember writing in my journal that I was grateful I had chosen to repent a few days before the tragedy, so that I had not been compelled, but that it had come from a true desire to change from within me.  I also remember wondering what it would be like to know someone who had been in one of the planes that had been forced to smash into the towers.

I did not have to wonder this for long, for within a few hours we were informed that one of our classmates had family on the second plane--his grandmother and aunt. We were all in shock--and Andy, the young man affected, was given something to help him sleep the rest of the day clear into the next morning. We all whispered in worried tones, wondering if he would go home. What a horrible thing to happen--how would he handle it?

We were shocked, and pleasantly surprised to watch Andy over the next few weeks as he fielded questions about being the "boy whose grandma was in the plane" with smile and ease. He shrugged it off, saying they were wonderful people, but he was doing fine.  I was amazed at how little it all seemed to affect him.  Little did I know how wrong I was.  And little did I know that Andy was about to teach me my second lesson about the Power of the Atonement of Jesus Christ.

I believe it was the November or December testimony meeting of that year--but Andy stood up to bear his testimony.  A hush fell over the congregation as they realized who he was.  We then listened to what--to me--has been the most powerful and heartfelt testimony I have ever heard.  Andy shared with us the true struggle he had been going through since his grandmother & aunt's passing.  He spoke of how he saw the terrorist's picture in the paper shortly thereafter--could even name him by name--and how perfect hatred had filled his soul for the man who had put his loved ones in such terrific fear and forced their deaths.  He spoke of how the terror and anguish he imagined the felt in their last moments of life haunted him, only fueling the hatred he felt for that man.  He spoke of the torture his soul was going through--a young returned missionary who knew full well that he was required to forgive the murderer, and yet he could not do it.  He had struggled to forgive, desperately struggled, and could not. 

He then spoke of the Atonement of Christ--of how it was helping him through it, of how he realized it was what enabled him to be with his family again.  His tone then changed, his voice cracked a little, as he shared of the moment he realized that his Savior suffered in the garden for those men too--for the men that killed his family.  He knew that though the Savior was just as saddened by what the man had done, he still loved him as a child of God and had died for him too.  As he realized this, he pled for the lord to help him forgive--and the gift of forgiveness that he could not produce himself was granted.  

Andy paused at this point, gathering his emotions--his courage--and with voice shaking, declared in the boldest and most firm voice I have ever heard from a pulpit, "I want you all to know that I FORGIVE THESE MEN."

That day, I learned the power the Atonement gives us to forgive.

The semester ended--a life changing semester whose lessons have become a rock for me to fall back on throughout my life to this point--and I returned to BYU.  A regular semester started up and I enjoyed renewing acquaintances of the past.  One such was a friend I ran into from my days in Young Womens back in Texas.  A dear friend who had always been as much as an example to me as she was a good friend.  As I was walking my bike up to campus one day, I had the impression to take a different route than my normal one. I questioned the decision as it meant going up a big hill, but went with the impulse. I soon found myself running into Stephanie Richards--the friend from my youth. We screamed as hugged as girls tend to do, and quickly caught up and promised a get together soon. I said a brief hello to her sister on the cell phone, thought about taking a picture with her, but not wanting to be annoying, gave her the hug good bye, and happily went on my way, thinking over memories of Stephanie.

The next morning, I received a phone call from my mom. Stephanie was dead. "No she's not", I remember arguing, "I just talked with her yesterday."  But between tears, my mom confirmed it was true. Only a few hours after my run in with Stephanie, she had gone sledding with her friends, run into a tree, smacked her head and died instantly. She was gone.

The reality of death never becomes so clear until you have someone you know pass away. Things become surreal--the daily tasks of mortality become so mundane as you realize their insignificance.  My mind and heart filled with questions--why was Steph taken so soon? What did it mean? Was she really done with her mission in life? 

Almost as quick as I could ask the questions--answers filled my heart.  Teachings from 9-11 came back to me. Our Heavenly Father was not shocked by her death as we were, he'd known this would happen all along. Somehow, it was part of the plan, and somehow, Steph was somewhere that needed her more.  I remember being completely filled with comfort, joy, and peace as the full message of the Plan of Happiness hit me--we would all see Stephanie again. And it was because of the Atonement of Jesus Christ.  I have never felt such peace as I did that sacred week that Stephanie Richards passed away.  It would be a long time before I could keep tears from springing to my eyes everytime we sang the hymn "I know that My Redeemer Lives".  For, I truly knew.

Stephanie's death taught me that the Atonement conquered death.

Why I had such closely related experiences that powerfully taught me the powers of the Atonement, I still do not know. But, I do know that it filled me with a testimony that became a powerful tool a year later when I went forward as an Ambassador and Representative of Jesus Christ.  There was no doubt in my mind who I testified of, and of the power, peace, comfort, and joy his Atonement could bring into the lives of those I taught.

It is because of the mission that Easter became one of my favorite holidays.  I spent my first mission Easter in the MTC.  They had this place called the "Call Center", where people could call in requesting a free DVD, Book of Mormon, or other materials of the church that they had seen advertised.  As wonderful conversations took place, and my love for people grew, I began to look forward to the call center.  These feelings heightened around Easter.  The Call Center was bombarded with calls of people requesting "Having Faith in Christ"--a relatively new presentation at the time following the life of Christ, his death, and resurrection.  

As it happened to be, it was the same year that The Passion by Mel Gibson had appeared in theaters--a rated R depiction of the death of Christ.  I personally had never seen the movie, and was thoroughly discouraged by all who called in reporting they had.  THe message was clear from all of them--the movie left them feeling dark. Christ had died. It was a horrible thing. The END.  They were all looking for something more--for hope.  Wasn't the message of Jesus a message of hope? Did we have anything that offered that? It was my privilege to testify that Christ DID rise from the dead, and that we had a wonderful new video--appropriate for the entire family--that let you feel that feeling of hope.

I loved that Easter. My favorite Easter by far :) 

My next Easter was spent in Uruguay--Rivera if I remember right, a large border town with Brazil.  The people there were wonderful, and it is a place that is near and dear to my heart.  I distinctly remember however, being thoroughly confused as to their celebration of Easter.  They actually called it "La Pascua"--meaning "The Passover".   Symbolically, the Passover was to teach Jews that death would pass over them if they were covered by the blood of the lamb.  However, in America we celebrate this as a completely DIFFERENT holiday, and one that only Jewish people really acknowledge.  It was interesting to me however that in the latin world, these holidays are one and the same. 

What astounded me is how many people invited us in over La Pascua, simply to ask what the celebration was all about? Apparently, in the Catholic faith, they do not teach that Christ rose again with a body of flesh and blood. This...really surprised me, and we would share scriptures with the people of how he came and ate fish and honeycomb with his disciples after his resurrection.  It became an eye-opening experience of just how lucky we are to have this knowledge.

Years have passed, and my Easters are once again filled with treats and precious memories made with family. I again enjoy Easter egg hunts with my little brother David, and celebrate fun Easter surprises with my husband.  

I am grateful that today was an Easter Sunday during general conference. I'm grateful for the tender talks on Christ, and of what he did this day that broke the bands of death, and that gives us the power to feel peace, to forgive, to be forgiven, and to have an Eternal Hope.

I love my Savior. I love the songs that sing praise to all that he did. I send this long but humble testimony out to the world that I know that Jesus Christ is the Savior of the world, that he died, the passed through the Garden of Gethsemane, and he rose from the dead. I hope to always be a witness of his name and help bring others to the same knowledge of the Atonement that I have experienced thus far in my life.  I leave this testimony on this Easter day, in the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.

~Beth Ann Alamo VanVliet~

Wedding Video!

Our videographer just posted a sneak peak of what is to come....well if we hire him to make the rest :) We LOVED the video...though we're both quite embarrassed by all the kissing! Sorry folks! Enjoy the video though, especially my kid brother David at the end :)  Copy and paste the link below :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e38DLEXfBSU&feature=player_embedded

PS our videographer was fantastic! Everyone loved him, and he did a great job. His website is www.hammervproductions.com 

 

Proposal Story

So, amidst the hustle and bustle of wedding planning--and who threw Christmas into the mix??!-- I have neglected my blog! Needless to say, I am marrying the most amazing man in the world on Jan 8, 2010. The last post was a link to engagement pics.  But for now...I'm going to share "The Engagement Story".

Rob actually proposed twice. I was awaiting some amazing confirmation from the heavens, so I didn't say yes the first time. It was at a beautifully romantic setting (the Draper Temple at night), with a view of the city lights to my right, and an illuminated temple behind him as he kneeled on the ground.  I was so shocked at what he was doing, I actually dropped my blanket!  At first I thought he was joking and said, "Yeah right, you have to have a ring for that!!".  My mouth fell open again as he pulled one from his pocket!  I (embarrassingly enough) said

 "Umm....I guess?". When I wasn't quite ready to set a date, Rob politely took the ring back and said he'd ask another time.  He did take a few pictures of the ring however, to keep it fresh on my mind ;)

After receiving the amazing spiritual confirmation I had been praying for, I took off for Yellowstone for a week with a group of kids from my school. Rob and I wrote each other everyday....only without email or postal service, we had to keep our letters until we could get back and show each other what we had written!  The week of reflection really helped me A) miss Rob! and B) adjust to the idea of leaving single life for married life.  By the time I got back, I was completely brimming with excitement to my very own Prince Charming!  We happily greeted each other, and Rob drove me home. I was EXHAUSTED from a week of treking around Yellowstone in blizzards, and caring for children.

But when I opened the door to my room....I Saw this!

With a ton of personal (and meaningful) touches, Rob had created the perfect Romantic atmosphere!  He had my teddy bear proposing to a cat with a ring pop (note the cat's look of surprise! He got velcro to hold its hands up that way!). He also decorated the ceiling with stars (something I had mentioned I loved back in July!), with a message that said, "Beth and Rob 4 ever!".  He also only put my favorite chocolate out for the picnic, and tracked down a scented candle I said I'd liked once.

In the midst of being amazed and surprised, Rob asked if we should listen to a little music, hit play on a hidden CD player, turned down the lights so that all we saw were the stars on the ceiling, and began dancing with me to a song I'd requested he listen to.  The song was "The One" by Gary Alan, a song where a man promises the woman he won't rush her, just steadily be there until she knows that He's the One.  That moment meant so much to me!

After dancing to quite a few other songs that fit our relationship, Rob put on "Our Song" (Brad Paisley's "Then"), and when he turned around from pressing play, he was already on one knee, with that ring box popped open!! This time, I was happily crying and gave a whopping "Yes! Or course!! Yes!!!" answer!! We hugged, took pictures, and celebrated with some glasses of Martanelli's!

I LOVED Rob's creativity, and persistence in "sealing the deal" with me.  It's been a whirlwind of wedding plans since that night, but a decision I will never regret. I grow more in love with this man everyday, and am 100% sure at this point, that I have found my "one". :)

Engagement Pictures!!!

Rob and I just got the CD of 206 engagement pictures back from last Saturday's shoot. SO fun to do, and look at! We feel like a bunch of goofs, but are happy how a lot turned out.

Please ignore the blinding blond hair--I went in for a few highlights the day before, and the girl must have thought I said I wanted to look like a HEADlight...sigh! Oh well, it's not as bright anymore, and--thanks to these ever so timely pictures--my posterity will always think of me as a platinum blond ;)

http://www.facebook.com/album.php?aid=2304319&id=17822679&l=419271d4fa

Trip to Washington!

I realize it's almost been a month since I last updated this! Oops! Time flies when you're having fun I guess :) I took a trip to the Vancouver, Washington/Portland, Oregon area at the end of September to see where Rob grew up. Beautiful place! It was just a short two day trip, but a lot of fun, and I had a field day trying to photograph it all! Rob also hooked me up with a Dentist friend of his who repaired a chipped filling. Sweet!

Multnomah FallsLook Closely! A lady offered to take a few pictures of us up on the bridge. Can you see us??
There we are!Lots of people offered to take our pictures--this is my favorite from the day :)And another awesome spot we found while troopsing around Oregon!
October has been my month of injuries! Rob and I went Mountain Biking at the Canyons one Saturday (Park City). A picture is worth a 1000 words so I'll summarize it this way:

Before Biking:

Me After Biking:Apparently you shouldn't use your hip as a brake! My 6 inch souveneir of the trip.
The day we got back Washington, my friend picked us up, then had me borrow her car so Rob and I could drive across the city to pick up MY car. As we were caravaning back to our houses, some random cones placed on a turn in the freeway forced Rob to merge into the other lane...where a group of oblivious and laughing teenagers were not paying a bit of attention to him. BOth of them came to a stop to avoid hitting each other, causing me to come to a complete stop behind them.

Unforunately, the lady whipping around the curve behind me didn't catch on to the change, allowing my car to stop her (instead of her breaks). Just a slight fender bender, but according to the chiropractic X-rays, It curved my spine a little. Yikes! Doesn't hurt too bad, but going in about twice a week to get it worked on.....still waiting for my free massage! My sessions have been canceled so far due to the woman being exposed to Swine Flu (!!!)
I've been recovering well from everything though, so no worries! The Bruises are gone, and scrapes nearly healed.

Other than that, we've been having a great time! Saturdays are our favorite, as we get the whole day to take some little adventure. Two of those adventures have been down to Provo, and it's been fun to show Rob my old college stomping grounds! We also have done some sessions in both the Portland & Draper temples--both of them AMAZINGLY gorgeous inside!!!

And what's a camera, without a few candid shots? :)

Brad Paisley & Mountain Splendor!

All Summer, I'd heard about the Brad Paisley/Dierks Bentley concert tour. It was coming to Phoenix!.....but in October, after I'd moved. It was at the Delaware State Fair!......but the day AFTER I was there. When I moved to Utah, I saw it would soon be playing here! And guess who got us tickets to go? We had a great time singing along to the songs & hiding under blankets when it started to rain! It was fun to see Rob laugh at the funny Brad Paisley songs he'd never heard (if you're not familiar with the guy--you tube a few of his songs. He's got quite the sense of humor, poking fun at our society!). The music also gave Rob the itch to go Country Dancing, causing him to spontaneously twirl me a few times, and declare music like that gives him the desires to move clear out to the middle of no where, and bail hay! :)Earlier that day, we tried to catch a tour at the Mt. Timp caves, but opted out of waiting in line for 3 hours. Instead we drove a little further for some great pictures, and exploring-the-woods adventures! I LOVE being out in nature. A fellow teacher this week said Utah "feeds her soul"--and I'd have to agree. This place is beautiful!!

We crossed a fallen tree to get to the other side of a creek, only to find that there was about a 20 foot climb up a 75 degree angled mountain side. Rob opted to shimmy up another fallen tree, while I got on all fours and pulled myself up the side, using roots, and a random rock or two! After trompsing through the woods for a good 15 minutes, Rob had the great idea to just take our shoes off and cross the creek (instead of go wayyyyyyyyy back and slide down the mountain wall, then cross the tree). It was a great idea!! Well......until we stuck our feet in the water! I thought Bear Lake was 10x's colder, but Rob thought it was nearly ice water and couldn't get out of it fast enough! All in all, it was an awesome day--lots of beautiful scenery, great music, and fantstic company! :)

All Better!!

I really have to start busting my camera out up here in Utah a little more often. I come on here to update, and have no visual aids!! Suffice it to say.....I AM HEALTHY again!!! (Yay! *clap*clap*clap*!). I was a little worried my "disease" (as Dr. Tx so kindly put it), would last months--but after getting quite bored this past week on bedrest, AND spending a whole day yesterday running around town and not getting tired, I've realized that the stinky Mono virus is gone!! May he never come back!!!

So now it seems the real adventure begins! I get to try out my new ward today (by myself--ack! Slight anxiety with that one, but I know it'll be fine once I give it a week or two......or three or four...:) AND I finally get to start my new job on Monday! I went to a parent orientation on Friday, where I was introduced to the parents of a bunch of children I have never met, then blankly tried to answer their random questions: "Tell me, Ms. Beth, what do those Greek symbols on the poster over there in the random corner say?" uh............sorry! It's all Greek to me!

I am thrilled however to finally have some energy back and get back to a normal life! It's been awesome to have some extra time on my hands and slow down a little bit. Got to work on some stuff I never take time for (we're talking busting out the old crochet skills & listening to Tennis Shoes Among the Nephite tapes...I'm sorry, but Harry Potter has nuthin on that adventure series! :)

I also have been enjoying the adventures of living with an engaged girl one month before her wedding! Sandra is awesome and has been one of my closest friends for 8 years. I love the long talks we have about relationships in general, what we're learning, what we love, what we're confused about, and just the general strength and peace we bring to each other. I was actually sitting in a temple session this past week, surrounded by women, and had this longing come over me to be with Sisters again (i.e. I miss Relief Society!!!!!). There is something sacred and awesome about the bond between girls!

OH--and I may have found a new fave restaurant! Rob and I went to some steak house last night....and wouldn't you know I can't remember the name! :( Anyway, it was kind of like the Texas Roadhouse, only fancier (you couldn't throw the peanut shells on the ground!). Really nice place, great service, and the food was a-MA-zing! They gave me this baked sweet potato, complete with cinnamon butter, marshmellows, and toasted pecans. HOLY HANNAH! It was like sweet potato pie for dinner...mmmm, mm :) Anyway, I highly recommend this place to any and all who can figured out the name of it! It was by Trolley Square....which means nothing to all of you outside of Utah! Oh well! :)

Happy Sunday everyone, and have a great week!

Lovin' Utah!

It's officially been a week now that I've been calling Utah home again, and even though I've spent the majority of that lying around in a bed, I can honestly say....I LOVE UTAH!!! It just might have a little something to do with the fact that it's been in the mid 80's all week (compare this with seering 110 AZ heat I left last week). I love the fact that when I went outside the other night, I had to bring a jacket with me, just in case! (I was going to post pictures, but just realized I haven't taken any this week.....so enjoy sunset at Bear Lake!! It's only 2 weeks old, so recent enough :)

I am feeling worlds better in the health department. Thank you to everyone who has expressed concern and well wishes for getting better. I remember the moment I overheard the Doctor urgently order a "Mono Spot" and the words "94% positive.....Mono.....Alamo....Room #7...." came drifting back to me that interesting night I spent in the care of ER's oh-so-not-comfortable services. I was in complete denial and a feeling of devestation came over me with what Mono would mean for me as I moved states and was scheduled to start a new job--a dream job--in just 2 days. I had a good 2 hours to mull the idea over and accept the fact before Dr. TX (Yep, that was his name--Tex. He came complete with rattlesnake cowboy boots!!), before he came in and dropped the news. He said it so gravely......he kinda scared me. It was like he was telling me I had terminal cancer. Seriously, it's just Mono.

What I have come to discover however is that.....bedrest ain't so bad :) Actually, I've come to realize it's a matter of attitude. Sure, a few days have beeen mind-boggingly boring as I've itched to get outside and have a little fun. Sure, it's both frustrating and a major guilt trip that I've put my brand new school in the position of starting school without a teacher (or a replacement). However, I've also come to relish this rare occasion to have TIME. My room is nearly all put together and unpacked (wait....that might not technically be "bedrest" activities....so....shhhhh!), catch up on some books, email friends and family, and basically....just BREATHE! I've actually really loved the thinking time & non-rushed scripture study. I could still do better with that, but it's been a great time to reflect.

I've come to realize these past few months what is important and who is in control (hint: it's not me). I have been humbled (and then humbled again when I don't get it the first through third times), my patience tried, my faith tested. It's been an interesting journey--a whirlwind that has come so quickly, and yet moved so slowly at times. At this point, all I know is how extremely blessed I am, and how grateful I am to "the true and living God" (Moroni says it a lot in the last chapter of Mormon--I love the phrase. We're given this time on earth to come to know and serve the True and Living God.)

I am greatful that I even though I'm sick, I'm not in pain. I'm greatful at the huge improvements I've seen in my health--especially the signs that my Liver is doing better. I'm greatful to be eating solid foods again--even if it is just Hamburger Helper noodles, minus the hamburger! I'm greatful I have an excuse to buy & drink Naked Juice (that stuff is divine!! Way too expensive, but simply heavenly :). I'm greatful for loving family & friends who have been so supportive. And I am greatful for the feeling of peace and calm I have right now--even when everything that I think is so important to my life right now seems to be dangling on a cliff about to fall right out of my life. It's been interesting to see the important things to me threatened, and to feel a peace that even if I lose them, life will be okay. In fact, life will still thrive, and march forward. God is in control. There's a huge peace that comes with that knowledge. I keep thinking of President Gordon B. Hinckley's advice he constantly gave out--"All will work out. Stick with it, with time, all will work out."

Anyway, enough philosophizing :) Point is (here's the cliff notes version people can jump to for the udpate!) I am feeling better! I am happy, and life is good :) Rob and I discovered a Nickel Cade around the corner from my house today too (It's an archade with old games from the 80's, and everything's a nickel to play. We went in with 5 bucks worth of nickel's, played our hearts out, and still walked out with a cupfull of change.)---It was a good day :)

Sick Days & Moving Adventures

Phew, what a weekend!

This past week just may have been one of the most stressful in my life, but also one filled with blessings. Throughout last week, I kept coming down with a Fever/headaches/sore throat-etc. Took a few days off of work, but just kept plugging along with the packing. Gave a teary-eyed announcement to the kids at work that it was my last day, only 10 minutes before they went home for the weekend. I didn't get to say good-bye individually to all that I wanted to, which kinda bummed me. They are fantastic kids though. Whoever gets them next...well, let's just say I'm jealous!! Thought I was doing pretty good till I took my Dad out for his Birthday Dinner on Friday night: I was sitting at dinner with my Dad and couldn't even get interested in my big bowl of spaghetti. I hadn't really eaten much in 3 days, and still....just wasn't interested in food. I was also FREEZING cold (in 115 Phoenix heat), so I told him I was going to head out to the car to get my jacket, and insisted he not get up, just enjoy his dinner, I'd be right back. Well, as soon as I was headed out to the car, my feet felt like lead, and all I wanted to do was climb into that car and sleep. I had to convince myself it would be rude to leave my dad in the restaurant by himself! So I came back and went into the bathroom. I sat down in a stall....and completely fell asleep. 15 minutes later I woke up, shook myself awake a bit, and came back out to a pretty worried father and apologized. I could barely keep my head up at dinner, wouldn't touch my food...and we eventually decided to forgo the rest of the evenings plans so that I could go home and go to bed. I put on sweats, and still with the chills, was asleep by 8:15, burning up with the hottest fever of my life, completely exhausted and feeling bad that I couldn't treat my Dad to more of a birthday evening, AND that I was missing Rob's birthday party as well.

Saturday I had the whole day to myself for packing, and did so. But...again, by 6:30, I just began to feel nautious and wiped out. I was forcing myself to eat throughout the day, but still not really even hungry. My 6:30 "nap" turned into a 13 hour nap.

Sunday, I got up early and went and picked up my Budget rental moving truck. Rob got back from Mexico and we got to visit both our Phoenix single's wards and say bye to people & introduce each other to friends and leaders. It was pretty fun, and there were some great talks! It was also officially Rob's birthday, so we celebrated with a frozen pizza, a cheesecake bday cake, and some presents.

Isn't he cute? I just love that picture :) I'm happy I got to celebrate his birthday with him, he is a fantastic guy that has enriched my life so much. It was a quick celebration, but fun :)

After that, we got to packing and some friends came over to help. As soon as I got up and started moving around again to pack....I just started feeling sick again. I was thinking, "sheesh Beth, you only get sick when you start to pack? C'mon!", so kept going and trying to get this stuff together. I had started to notice that day as well that both my skin and eyes were telling yellow, and that I kept getting bloody noses. I would also start feeling nautious when I smelled greasy foods (particularly fried chicked at the grocery store had about done me in the day before!) Part way through the packing, I walked into the kitchen, took one look at our leftover birthday pizza, spun around in disgust and for the first time in my life, began vomiting into the kitchen trashcan. I just stood there shocked! What on earth??? I took off for the bathroom, and felt it rising again, and to my horror, saw this stuff go flying through the air before I could even reach the toliet. Next thing I knew, there was Rob, patting my back, and lightly joking as I sat there crying and puking into the toliet. Definitely an embarressing experience, and one I will never forget. Rob became a superhero to me in the minute though, and I am grateful for his help and support in getting me through the rest of the evening.

Long story short, I ended up in the ER that night, hooked up to an IV and getting bloodwork done. Turns out I have a severe case of Mono that has begun to affect my Liver (the yellow skin, eyes, lack of appetite, inability to digest protein & grease, and bloody noses are all signs of liver problems...who knew!). I've been ordered on bed rest for this whole week, with a possible 3 more weeks of recovery. They were horrified to find out we had a moving van packed and were about to head across the country, and when I told them I was starting a new job that week, they said, "Mmm....bad timing. Too bad, you are not to enter schools."

As much as I was not planning for this, I am extremely grateful it was not my gal-bladder (which would require surgery), and am glad I don't have some weird Hepitits A thingy (the other yellow eyeball disease). I'm grateful my "treatment" is to sit around and read books and blog!! I really wish this had not fallen on the week I started a new job or the week I was moving. However, have been completely taken by surprise at the friends who have stepped in and taken care of everything I could not this weekend, without complaint or request of any return favor. A big thank you to my parents who have been a source of comfort, support, and information from afar. To Angela Cronnin for listening to some TMI abt me and offering her medical advice, to the Wolfgraham boys for moving my furniture like it was a bunch of toothpicks, and to Mandy Nielsen for giving of her time to move boxes, to Lynn for taking care of tying up loose strings with the apartment, and of course to Rob, who is quite possibly the most patient man on earth!

We spent 15+ hours driving up to Utah in the Budget truck (with the car attached, we couldn't go more than 55mph, and only about 35 mph up the hills!). Rob wouldn't let me drive, which was kind of him, and I'm impressed he took on such a big project. We had some good quality time together and enjoyed the adventure for what it was worth :) He finished all the packing, and has been taking care of things up here in Utah as well. Seroiusly, the man has superman genes in him, I'm amazed he's pulling this off! :)

This weekend was definitely an adventure I will never forget. Thank you to everyone!! Our driving pictures from yesterday: